Awkward Moments
by NarglesandNifflers
Summary: Leon always seems to walk in on Merlin and Arthur at the wrong time...Includes the poetry scene from 5x03.


**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Merlin, or any of the characters. I don't own the dialogue from the poetry scene either – it was taken straight from The Death Song of Uther Pendragon.**

**A/N: So I was watching Merlin the other day (The Death Song of Uther Pendragon) and I thought the poetry scene was really funny. It inspired me to write this one-shot, which includes the poetry scene from Leon's point of view. I was originally only going to write about the poetry scene; however, I changed my mind and made up two other scenes.**

I don't know why it always happens to me.

That's three times its happened now. _Three. _And it's always me. Never anyone else. Never any of the other knights. Why does it always have to be me?

Many of the knights wonder why. Not why it always happens to me, why I never seem to scare easily. I tell them that, once you've seen as many things as I have, it will take a lot to scare me.

The first time was awkward enough. I still remember it well; unfortunately, I'll probably always remember it well….

I made my way to the large wooden door in front of me. Only a few more minutes Leon, I thought, and you'll be in your bed. My head was throbbing, probably a result of earlier, when one of the knights – I'm still not entirely sure which one – hit me on the head with his shoe. Exactly why he was throwing his shoe across the room is still something I'm not entirely sure about, however, it was probably…

The sight that met me as I opened the door distracted me from my thoughts. Arthur and Merlin were standing in the middle of the darkened room; Arthur dressed in red and looking as shocked as I was, and Merlin, wearing his usual clothes and looking equally shaken. The two of them blinked and drew back slightly, as I stood and stared at them in amazement. What on earth, I wondered, could the two of them be doing standing alone in the corridor in the middle of the night?

"Arthur. Merlin," I eventually heard myself say, once I could trust myself to speak. Considering the disturbing and frankly terrifying thoughts that were currently running through my mind, I was quite impressed that my voice sounded quite steady.

"Leon," they said in unison. They were obviously trying to act casually, but were failing miserably. Did they really think I didn't know what they were doing? I had a very good idea what was going on and had no desire to know any more.

"Is everything all right my Lord?" I was aware that my feelings of shock were displayed on my face but it didn't even occur to me to try and hide them.

"Everything's perfectly fine," said Arthur. There was a short pause during which I continued to stare at them in disbelief, trying to stop the visions now forming in my mind. _Shut up brain,_ I thought feverishly.

"We were….." Arthur began; I could almost see his brain working frantically. "We…Merlin, tell Leon what we're doing."

Could they be any more obvious? My question was answered in the next few seconds; apparently they could. Whilst Arthur continued to stare at me solemnly, Merlin half glanced at him, stammered "we were…" before taking a deep breath and saying, "I'm teaching him some poetry."

"Poetry?" I repeated in incredulity. Was this a code word for kissing? Or worse of course, but I don't want to even go there.…

Arthur seemed to struggle with himself for a moment before saying, "I….love poetry."

_Really_ convincing, Arthur, I thought as I continued to gape at them. They couldn't really think I believed this 'poetry' excuse, surely? Merlin laughed.

"I was as surprised as you are! He can't get enough of it!"

My eyes widened, and I was seized by a sudden desire to run, to run until I was safely at the other side of the castle.

"I'll…..I'll leave you to your poetry then, my Lord." I nodded at them, and made my way to the other side of the room, pausing to glance back at them in bewilderment as I left. At least I have a good story to tell to the rest of the knights, I thought wryly, even if it came at the high price of being traumatised for life. However, unfortunately this didn't turn out to be the last time I caught them at an awkward moment.

The second time was worse, a hundred times worse. I found them in the dining room. I had expected to enter and see Arthur sitting eating his dinner and Merlin standing beside him, playing the part of the dutiful servant as always. Well, not _quite _always, you should hear the way he speaks to Arthur sometimes, but I digress.

The scene that met my eyes was _extremely_ different to what I'd been expecting. Both of them were on their feet and standing much closer to one another than necessary. I glanced at the long wooden table, where Arthur's abandoned plate of chicken lay, clearly untouched. As I looked at the plate of food, much to my horror, I heard a soft moan. I slowly raised my eyes to where Merlin and Arthur were standing, their eyes half closed, which explained why neither of them had noticed that I was in the room. As I watched, I saw Arthur raise a hand and rest it on the side of Merlin's face, gently stroking his cheek. "Merlin," he murmured, "you…"

I staggered backwards in shock and instinctively coughed loudly to alert them of my presence. Merlin shot away from Arthur as though he was contagious. Arthur stared at me in shock for a few seconds, blue eyes widening in horror, cheeks rapidly turning redder and redder, before making a brave attempt at a casual smile. Unfortunately it failed, but at least he tried, unlike Merlin, who seemed unable to move in shock.

Arthur kept the feeble smile on his face as he turned to Merlin. "Er, I was just….Merlin, you have some dirt on your cheek, I was just, you know, just informing him…." He spoke unusually quickly. I felt my cheeks flood with colour.

"Er, right. Fine. Well, I…I was just here to ask about the hunting trip tomorrow," I stuttered. I was fully aware of the fact that I was talking almost as fast as Arthur had been, but I couldn't help it.

Arthur blinked. "Right. What about it?" He took a deep breath, attempting to pull himself together.

"I…..it's fine. I'll come back tomorrow and ask about it. I've just realised, er, that there's something I need to do." I turned and half walked half ran out of the room.

Well, I thought, as I leaned against the wall once safely out of the room and waited for my heart rate to return to normal, at least I have another amusing story to tell the knights. Amusing for _them,_ anyway…..

The third time was most definitely the worse. I was walking slowly around the castle, unsure of where I was going, lost in my own thoughts. I was jerked out of them most unpleasantly, however, when I walked absentmindedly into a small, dark room no one ever goes into. I was about to turn and leave when I heard a muffled sound in the corner of the room.

"Hello?" I called. "Is anyone there?"

I heard a gasp and, despite the fact I didn't know who it was, felt my heart sink. "Who's there?" I asked tentatively.

There was a silence as I peered through the gloom. The air was cold and, despite the heavy armour I was wearing, I felt myself shiver. I cleared my throat and spoke again.

"Show yourself!" I commanded. "I know you're in the corner of the room – I can see your shadows moving. Unless you want me to drag you out into the corridor...

"No!" The voice sounded flustered, anxious, fearful.

I shut my eyes, all of a sudden thankful the room was dark. "King Arthur? Is-is it just you here?"

"No," came an unsteady voice. "I'm here too."

_As if I couldn't guess. _I could hardly believe this was happening _again._

"I'm teaching Merlin some duelling," came Arthur's weak voice through the darkness. "In, er, return for the poetry lessons…."

I opened my mouth, feeling faint, however, no sound came out. What could I say? I raised a shaking hand to wipe my clammy forehead, and stammered, "Well, I'll leave you to your, er, duelling." As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I turned and fled, grabbing the handle of the door and wrenching it open.

As it opened, I made the great mistake of glancing back over my shoulder. The door was wide open, flooding the room with light. Huddled in the corner of the room, their faces so red I could almost feel the heat radiating from them, was Merlin and Arthur. Their hair was rumpled, their clothes were strewn all around them, and, to complete the horrifying vision, they were both completely naked.

For a few seconds, I stood there, rooted to the spot, unable to move in horror, before I opened my mouth in a terrified scream, turned, and ran for my life.

So from then on, no matter what dangerous quest awaited me, I would never again experience such terror as I did that day.

**A/N: So what did you think? I wrote this quite quickly and I'm not sure if it showed or not. Please review!**


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